Well I had the last zoom session with my T yesterday.. He also loathes zoom as much as I do. Next session will be in person thank god !

Well I went off on a rant about the last appt with my retiring Pdoc. Richard was also very mad about how I was treated. he has known Dr Graves for close to 30 years. Everybody knows Dr Graves is not a warm fuzzy guy. hes an Aspie and there is some PD involved. But still... It was very wrong how he handled our appt. Richard and I agreed that he should have taped a message to his computer that said something like I wish you well and I'm sure X NP will be able to help you, Thanks " but no he didnt. Honestly if Dr Graves is this ill he should have just left and let someone take right over, I would have have much prefered that to having a less than that less that 2 minute insult. I told Richard that Im annoyed I even paid for that appt. He said I can file a complaint but honestly it wont help anything anyway.

Then Richard told me that Jane the nurse is also retiring end of the month, My head literally just hit the desk.. I knew she was considering it and Im really very happy that she is, she has worked her entire life and deserves to retire and go enjoy life and not have not have to wake up so early each day. Caught up with her before I left lots of hugs and tears.

In a way I do feel better having been able to rant to Richard about the pdoc issue. Now there is the big question of if the NP will want me off Xanax... i wont see her til July and Richard has never meet or talked to her, he said a few clients have said she is okay... So I need to hurry up and wait.

Steve has been really tired today, But he has been busy this week so I hope that is all it is and not some infection brewing.

I see my Cardiologist in the morning. My blood pressure does drop from lying, to sitting and certainly standing. Not sure if anything can be done other that I have to just sit and wait then stand and wait.. Its so hard to remember to do that, especially when I am burning dinner LOL

My rage is still with me, I know eventually it will go away. It just seems like its been here for years and years.. It really all started in Nov. Now there literally isnt any psych meds I can take I will need a way to find some balance and again ride out the Bipolar waves... Better get a new surf board and more sunblock

I am happy that mask restrictions are going away. In the last few months I have really struggled to wear one and get what I need from stores while battling a panic attack brought on by having to wear a mask. I know many people think this is far to soon. but speaking just for myself....My husband and I are fully vaccinated and feel like we have sacrificed a year and just lost over a year actually.

My daughter is coming next month for a week and I hope his middle son will be coming soon, Hes dying to bring his wife up.

I just really really need to catch a break Bipolar wise and physical health wise ! ( Like we all do )