Not sure if this is related to this topic, but I had 2 loving parents and a big extended family. I had no history of abuse of any kind, I was paid attention to as a kid, and I don’t have a personality disorder and my self esteem and self worth are fine.

But I’ve noticed the more unprofessional the therapist is I have a harder time leaving them and getting over them. But the very good ones I’m fine with moving on. I had a really bad emotionally abusive therapist that I stuck with for 4 years until she terminated me. It was really hard getting over her and I ended up in the hospital and every mental health professional I’ve encountered since that incident in 2015 has blamed her.

Then my last therapist was kind of passive aggressive at times, you could tell when she was having a bad day then she’d apologize the next time for her behavior and she was fine. She switched up boundaries like crazy and made a lot of false promises. I just felt confused by her all the time. But almost 3 months later I still miss her sometimes.

Then the 2 therapists I was the closest to, one I met with for 2.5 years, the other just for a year. and another decent one I was with for 3 years, I had no problem moving on from them when the time came.

Why is this happening? Why is it so tough to get over the bad/toxic/unprofessional passive aggressive ones but easy to get past the good ones?