Same here - those labels, including "toxic", apply to my husband, in my experience of him. What the reality is for me in my own marriage, is his harmful behaviors began to erode my mental health, my self esteem and my sense of self. He also negatively impacted my physical health. I've come to know that he is not good for my health or my mental health. I was starting to unravel in many ways and I stopped taking good care of myself because of his toxic or unhealthy behaviors.

Perhaps another word for toxic is simply unhealthy. There have been people I've had to walk away from who have impacted my health negatively, so I've had to sever ties, either romantically or friendship-wise. To me, that's the definition of toxic, but I think this term can really be used interchangeably with unhealthy. At least in my experience, this is what it feels like. My husband is/was unhealthy for me - and that's why I've had to walk away and am now divorcing him.