Maybe it's a buzz word. I would call the people that traumatised me toxic for me personally, though. One of them is definitely who would get called toxic by others too, but supposedly it can also be subjective if based in incompatibility and being too close to each other despite the incompatibility, maybe. I don't know if I entirely believe that interpretation because I think normal, non-toxic people would still have the ability to take responsibility and change behaviours that truly affect the other person so strongly. Or if not able to change these behaviours, normal people will try to distance rather than keep contributing to a toxic close relationship. Normal people will try and figure it out objectively and in a constructive way too, not just wanting all the drama and stuff. They have boundaries and actual concern for how they affect others and so will try to get out of these things as soon as they can. I think truly toxic people have the toxic behaviours as a pattern throughout all relationships and interactions and it's not just sporadic mistakes that everyone can make. What can be individual about it is maybe that we all have different strengths and weaknesses so you can probably withstand some forms of toxic stuff longer than other forms.


I don't really like the word personally, for some reason, it's just so negative yes, but then I also don't like the word "abuse" and yet it exists....


PS: Someone mentioned toxic = mean. I don't think so, because some people can be very good at appearing like a good person but are actually subtly manipulative to exploit others. To me that's still toxic, and yeah mentally abusive too. The one person I mention above, she did have a cold mean streak she could easily use when tact no longer worked to get what she wanted, yeah. Less subtle. More stereotypically toxic.

Tbh not going to read the rest of the thread though, because I think it's too negative a topic for me.