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Old May 18, 2021, 09:12 PM
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~Christina ~Christina is offline
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Member Since: Jul 2011
Location: Tennessee
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Quote:
Originally Posted by wildflowerchild25 View Post
@~Christina I am not in a purely DBT program as I refused to do that. I am in a general adult psych PHP. However I am trying to keep an open mind because they do have some DBT courses as a part of the general curriculum.

I see met with my therapist and made a safety plan today. I meet the pdoc tomorrow and seriously not a moment too soon. I was a complete wreck today. I was depressed this morning BUT I woke up at 6:30am which is way earlier than I usually get up if I don’t have to be up for work. I was a little agitated by the noise, had to mute the group a couple of times but there’s no way to turn on captions so I have to turn it back on to make sure no ones talking to me.

So I was a bit agitated during DBT but I was able to be honest during process group about the fact that I self harmed yesterday. But when I realized the final group of the day was art???? Oh my god I can’t even explain what happened. I FLIPPED MY *****. I got completely consumed by rage. I mean I wanted to slash my computer screen. I have no idea why! I mean just because it was art therapy and I don’t like art therapy? That deserves rage?

And then during my safety plan meeting I was crying at every answer. And then, AND THEN, it just...went away??? Like now I’m totally happy and fine with life. I’m feeling very sped up but in a “good” way, not a stabby way. I took extra seroquel to hopefully fall asleep at some point tonight. I took 100mg which is the max recommended by another pdoc last summer when I wasn’t sleeping.

Damn I just hope tomorrow is at least one mood, whatever mood it lands on.

Hey! Yeah sorry about thinking it was just DBT, I do understand your frustration about that.

I am so sorry that you are going through such torment Your in a god awful mixed episode and that is just hell on earth.

I'm hoping that the Pdoc can find a medication that can help break this episode up. You so need a break sooner rather than later. I'm sorry you self harmed
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Thanks for this!
*Beth*, Soupe du jour