((((((((((((((((( mouse ))))))))))))))))))

One of my worst T sessions ever was very much like the one you described. There was so much silence, and he just sat there STARING at me, even when I asked him not to. I retreated further and further and, like you, just shut down. It was a Friday session, and I was so, so angry over the weekend - not a familiar or comfortable feeling for me. I felt worse and worse as the weekend went on.

I did a LOT of writing over the weekend - composed a long, long letter to T telling him how the session made me feel. I worked on it all weekend. I brought it with me to my Monday session, but didn't give it to him...but I DID tell him the things the letter said - how he made me feel, etc. He really listened, and admitted the areas where he was at fault, and apologized. It was big, big, big. It was our first rupture, and probably one of the first times in my life I stood up for myself and told someone how I was feeling about how I was treated. I would say in the end, it was the beginning of trusting him for me - and the beginning of trusting myself.

((((((((((((((((((((mouse))))))))))))))))) I hope that you feel better, and that this becomes an opportunity to move forward for you. Try not to shut down, even though everything in you might be telling you to do that. Let T know how you feel....