Hi kimmydawn!

Anger can be a scary thing no doubt. Some of us have been the brunt of angry outbursts from a loved one and we realize all too well how terrible it feels. It very often is demeaning in character. We end up feeling as though we are the reason for that persons anger. If we had done this or we hadn't done that, then that person wouldn't be so angry with us now.

It took me many years to realize that the anger being thrust upon me had nothing to do with me. I was convenient and one hell of a punching bag for years. Hence, I learned what I lived and became an angry person myself. Lashing out in inappropriate ways was the norm for me.

Over the years I learned to question myself on what was really making me angry. After awhile I finally realized that I wasn't happy with myself and that's why I was angry. I had become what someone else accused me of being....stupid, fat, ugly, a ***** etc etc etc. Those angry words defined me as a person for far too long.

When I did realize my problem, I set out to work on it little by little. With the help of my friends and co-workers, I worked on my self esteem and my coping skills. Before I knew it, there were wonderful things happening. I saw myself in a better light. I smiled more. I laughed a lot! I learned how to deal with the anger that surfaced when it surfaced...not later after things would build up and just the slightest little thing would set me off.

Breathing....that was a big thing for me. Pay attention to the next time you get angry....are you holding your breath? Are you getting red in the face? If you are, then remind yourself to breath. It cleanses you as you work through the emotion. If you have to, take yourself out of the situation you are in that is setting you off. Even if it's just a couple of minutes to gather yourself up and breath. Then you can get back to where you were and handle things with more control.

I hope you can find some kind of coping mechanism that works for you dear. For myself, I am a new person since I've gotten my anger under control. There is so much more love of self and love of life now, and I am finally happy! I pray for the same thing for you!

hugssssssssss