As things start to open up from the pandemic and I get back to some of my regular activities that I didn't do all year, I realize how much I miss Tamster and what a whole her death has created in my life. I really miss all my phone conversations with her. I used to talk to her all the time, and I wish she was around so I could talk to her about all the new things happening. So much has changed in my life. And she was always so supportive - just a wonderful friend and cheerleader. Even a mentor in so many ways.

It's just hard because I felt so close to her, but never got to meet her in person. I wish I could have gone to her funeral or told her family what she meant to me. But I know that it would be an intrusion on their life. I also know that their experience of her may be different than mine, and I don't want to intrude upon their own grief and mourning.

I wish I could think of something to do to honor her rightly that would help me with my grief. I'm not quite sure what though.