I suggest trying a mindfulness technique that was very helpful to me.

Each time you notice that feeling of "unpleasant atmosphere", nonjudgmentally say to yourself "This feeling is what I am learning to not respond to." If you didn't notice the feeling until later, then nonjudgmentally say to yourself "That feeling was what I am learning not to respond to."

Each time you find yourself running around to please someone, nonjudgmentally say to yourself "This is what I need to stop doing." Then take a moment to think nonjudgmentally about the moment where you went off course, and how you wish you had handled things at that moment.

By being nonjudgmentally aware of responses that you wish to change, you can gradually come to change the way you respond to the "unpleasant atmosphere" cues.

Being nonjudgmental about yourself is very important. You were taught to do something one way, now you wish to learn to do it another way. You can learn the new way--over time.