Why is it that all my artistic heroes either kill themselves or try to?

I was heartbroken to hear that Hunter Thompson killed himself. He was one of my early journalism heroes. If he did as many drugs as he claimed, it's a miracle he lived as long as he did, but I could have accepted an overdose -- it would have been in character. A bullet through the head isn't in character.

Then there was Spalding Gray, who walked into the East River, and Kurt Cobain, the guy who spoke to MY part of "Generation X" (I still maintain he had jack to say to 12-year-olds, though they were the ones getting all melodramatic about his death). I'm sure there are more I'm just not thinking of right now.

Kurt Vonnegut, who on my list of heroes falls somewhere in between Carl Bernstein and God, did such a good job of trying it once that it landed him 30 days in the nuthouse.

Is it something about the artistic temperament? Some would argue that I have one of those, being a writer. While I've certainly been actively suicidal, I got personally escorted to the hospital by my pdoc before I could do anything about it. (Pissed me off at the time, but I'm grateful now.) What is it about these people that makes them go through with it? Not to mention, why can't I like "normal" people/artists who won't go around offing themselves?

I hope this didn't upset anybody. I'm just really, really sad, and needing to think (type) out loud.

Candy