I now thank my dissociation for protecting me. Had everything I experienced since I was a baby entered my consciousness all at once, I would have lost my mind.

I do want to 'heal' from dissociation because these days, it makes life harder. For instance, I may dissociate if there's a difficult conversation to be had that might lead to consequences I won't like, for example the ending of a relationship. However, I now understand that if the only way a relationship can survive is by ignoring issues, it's not really meant to be and it would be healthier for all involved to be honest and go our separate ways if need be. I'm also no longer a baby who will die if she loses someone in her life. I'm now capable of looking after myself and asking for help when I need it. I don't need to cling to anyone for survival.