Just wanted to say thank you to everyone here for all the support and encouragement! I've been through this before and tried to do it on my own for four years before finally having a major manic episode. Then my mother got diagnosed with a pretty ugly cancer a couple years ago and died this year. It was so hard for me to hear people complain about the pandemic and their little problems while I was taking care of my mother, my son with autism, and having to deal with my father's mood episodes as well as my own in the middle of a pandemic. After a major meltdown depression, I got in with a new pdoc, so I know it's a process. I was well on Lamotrigine for almost six years, back when I was seeing a different pdoc, but that's a whole other long story, so I have faith that I'll be well again. I like my new pdoc even more than my previous one. That's a great start :-)

Thanks for the warm welcome and all of your insights!