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Originally Posted by TishaBuv
When I look back on those emotional meltdowns I am very embarrassed and wish I could have not had them. I was telling myself ‘this is BS’ at the time, but couldn’t disengage.
IDK why I stopped the intense, emotional reactions recently. It’s like my body turned off the waterworks. I’m just happy I’m done with it whatever caused me to stop! 
I’m not sure I’m out of the woods with it, either. So, fingers crossed… |
Oh, that's cool that it's better now. Hope it stays that way. Maybe you getting support from the therapist helps, like maybe you are not looking for it with your husband instead?
When I'm able to call an emotion bull**** it disengages me actually. Because I know why it's bull****.
But I have to first know that, yeah.
Quote:
Originally Posted by TishaBuv
I see a therapist and he is teaching me to simply not react. He says to just feel those emotions, identify them, and let them pass. They are just emotions and they always do pass. This has been very hard to do when those emotions cause a panic fight/flight response. I am getting better at it. But— I still can’t get past what triggers me and overcome it. Though, I am getting better at not letting it get the best of me emotionally.
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Yeah, for me the problem is if it takes too long to figure out the emotion and it takes me long for sure when it comes to personal matters......And while I'm figuring it out it does get in the way and that's a problem. So for that, this idea of "this is just an emotion and it will pass" does not work for me because it does GET IN THE WAY while it's there, while it doesn't pass, it is several hours per day and it means I have to wait until the evening or even until the night before I'm able to work without the emotions being in the way.
This dilemma/issue I don't see answered by this idea "it's just an emotion and it will pass"
It's very practical consequences, missing deadlines and the like.
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I learned about DBT from others on here. They say it is a course. I’ll have to look into doing it. Dialectical Behavior Training.
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Yeah the whole "emotions will pass" idea is from the distress tolerance thingy in DBT.
My issue isn't distress tolerance though. It's these practical consequences.
And I was so disoriented before about what's even going on that I didn't realise for a million years until I finally did recently, that the DBT workbooks and similar books talk about being "uncomfortable".
Uncomfortable?! Man... it's not about that for me. If these emotions were just uncomfortable, I'd be FINE. Lol that just sounds like an everyday problem, uncomfortable feelings, emotions to endure. No big deal.
But the actually problematic emotions get in the way and are hard to move out of the way. Hard because if I try, without knowing why the emotion is even there, then it requires an insane amount of energy that I just don't have normally, it requires me to mobilise emergence resources and you are not supposed nor able to use those resources constantly...... You can imagine.
So that's my problem, not that they are "uncomfortable". Lol when is it even a problem that something is uncomfortable.
But trying to move emotion out of the way without knowing how to do that effectively, it's the problem. If you don't know how to do it effectively is when it's gonna require a crazy amount of energy. I am doing it right now as I am trying to work atm. It still makes my stomach muscles sore.
So emotional dysregulation from cPTSD isn't easy or fun, lol.
Yes I'm discovering slowly why the emotions are there, what they really are about, but that takes very long for me for these personal matters. .... But when I know these things is when I'm able to effectively manage / move the emotions out of the way like that
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BTW. As for DBT.... I compared it to stoicism here:
https://mysupportforums.org/7082825-post20.html
What do you think? Do you like any of that?