I’ll be honest I really don’t think I can go through the process of working with another therapist and it ending like this against. I’ve worked with three therapists now over the past three years and two have ended extremely badly and retraumatised me due to the feelings and rejection and abandonment. How do I take that risk again? How do I ever believe that they are a ‘good’ therapist? The process of trying different ones out is exhausting and expensive and I just don’t know how I ever trust again.
I feel devastated and broken. I wish I had the courage to end it all, it’s all I can think about.