Are any of these people just a little bit professional?!!!!? I talked with my Pdoc today. I told him my Xanax wasn’t working. I was out of control with it and taking 5 a day sometimes. I literally told him everything. Then he said “how about I switch you to Ativan? It works better and longer. I said “yeah whatever but how do I safely go off the Xanax and onto the Ativan?” He said it shouldn’t be a problem. Just take a Xanax and then take an Ativan. Wtf. Is it that easy??? I don’t think so.

But then it got worse. I told him about my new therapist. And he said that she is extremely unprofessional and wants me to stop seeing her ASAP. He said in the meantime would I be ok doing a few video sessions with my previous T. I said “I’d be ok. But I’m not sure about her” I swear this T is like being in a bad relationship. She’s toxic. Yet I desperately want to go back to her. Plus I’m not sure she’ll take me back with the transference that was going on. And if she says no that’s just gonna destroy me.

I feel soooo ****ed up right now.