That's what I did for 4 years with that "best friend" I had. That is, the energy was drained out of me with me trying to help her so much.

As for the rest of your post. I know what to avoid. So you don't have to tell me any of that.


But I don't know what is okay to ask for from family. Friends are not relevant here as it is now, I don't have any IRL friends left.

As you can see, my thread title's about that too (how to find social support).


So, instead of the avoidance mindset, I would like to have the approach mindset here.

I know what's too much, but I don't know what I CAN ask for. What fits with the normal boundaries.

I did not know I shouldn't put so much energy in with that "best friend" (and another friend but that was less extreme thank god), exactly because I don't know from experience about what's a truly quality friendship and so yeah, I don't know what I CAN ask for. (This includes family too, like I said I don't have IRL friends left)

Especially as since cPTSD I have a problem with handling conflict, the more personal it is, the worse my ability. So I don't really want to learn the hard way always, like, if it looks like I'd have to have a fight about it if family doesn't feel like helping me with something, ....I'd rather not even ask for it.

So I'm asking here what's ok and normal to ask for.


I may not have worded my original question about this clearly enough because it sounds like I was asking about the "avoidance part", but I hope it is clear enough now. Thanks.