Here I got the mower fixed and got it back home. it was in mower mode and then I couldn't start it back up. So I had to get it out of mower mode again to get it to start. Sadly, I ended up getting into an with mother and it just deteriorated into some name calling and blame and all. I'm used to it by now. I got it back into the shed. I was just angry and all I get is along the lines of 'it's your fault, your responsibility'. I just took her remarks very hard and just hated that thing all of a sudden in that yard, and I was just fuming all over the place. I don't know why. She hated it when I got upset and I couldn't blame her for wanting to fire back at me. I'm such a **** misfit in the world anyway. She kind of wishes I'd be taught a lesson or something and I don't feel like giving a ****. It doesn't seem like I was really made for this world, being a damn girl with icing on top. laughs. I can't seem to feel any genuine happiness and I don't feel I ever will unless I happened to make something big happen that's good maybe. Usually I force it because I don't feel much happiness. Am sorry to say. I kind of hate myself when I feel this way. I really do. I don't know why I bother caring because it'd be the same old vicious cycle. This world doesn't seem to be made for me. No, I'm not kidding when I say this. I don't really fit in the picture because the fact is, there is no picture for me to fit into. Does it matter at all if I exist?