My closing date on my house is May 28th so preparation for that has sort of interrupted my anxiety from its "hybernation". It hasn't bothered me in a long time, on rare occasion ill feel it come and go for just seconds, but just now I felt that tingling going through me (that all to unfamiliar feeling) and I automatically thought I was going to need to call someone from work to go to the hospital. I hate that mode of thinking i go into when the panic attack is about to happen. I do not need any panic attacks right now, I have been doing so good! I am not medicated for anything, I go do doc tomorrow for more synthroid, but im half tempted to ask her for a 30 count of xanax for emergencies. I know I feel stronger without it, but I would call what i just experienced a mini-panic attack. I lose all my normal thinking and go into scared mode. I forgot everything i learned about burying the attack, or attempting to stop it in its tracks. RRR!
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Do not stand at my grave and weep; I am not there. I do not sleep. I am a thousand winds that blow. I am the diamond glints on snow. I am the sunlight on ripened grain. I am the gentle autumn's rain. When you awaken in the morning's hush, I am the swift uplifting rush of quiet birds in circled flight. I am the soft stars that shine at night. Do not stand at my grave and cry; I am not there, I did not die. R.I.P. Bandit 7-12-08 I love you I miss you.
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