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Originally Posted by seesaw
What is it? Buttercup? I don't know the context of this remark. Every day? He said it once? He was trying to put her at ease with a compliment?
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Firstoff, I am saying all this for the sake of OP.
She mentioned more than one of these.
A male manager simply cannot talk like this to a female employee. That's not a way to put them at ease with compliments like that.
OP needs to move on from such inappropriate relations, disengage from them, not enter them at all, and find healthy ones instead.
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The problem is Ruby cannot tell the difference. I have had playful nicknames with coworkers that I have good relationships with.
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That's coworkers, not the same situation.
I don't think OP is joking when she says she's felt emotionally abused a lot.
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He may have done this before he realized Ruby's infatuation tendencies.
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This is inappropriate, no matter whether she has "tendencies", no matter who the female employee is. Wait, I am repeating myself. It's simply a strict rule at work. Not my invention, either.
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The point is: we do not know. This is why it's essential for Ruby to maintain that list of boundaries because she cannot tell the difference between a friendly compliment and a romantic advance.
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This isn't even about that. This is basic boundaries between people in power vs the people they manage, especially if they are male, but really, that just adds to the power aspect, it would be inappropriate between female boss, male employee too.
OP needs to know about this boundary, too. About power related issues as well.