So you say you were first trying to befriend him in an overly emotionally open way before he ever did anything, I get that, but what I am saying is that he also didn't keep boundaries. Of course it may be like with how some people are unable to say "no", because they want to be "nice", but it's still their responsibility to be able to say "no".

So all I am saying is he has a responsibility too in this situation that all this ended up at. As a manager of you, and of the opposite sex, he should never have behaved that familiar with you. Even if he had good intentions, just no.


Yes, you also probably crossed boundaries with him but that doesn't change the fact that you need to look beyond yourself to understand the entire situation.

But also in yourself, too. You need to understand how his words and actions affected you and how it led to this kind of strong attachment interacting with your existing issues. And then hopefully, eventually you'll know when to avoid people who are being too friendly overstepping boundaries/not keeping them clear.

Because I do not believe that there is any point to putting literally all the responsibility and blame on you if you want to fully understand the entire situation. It always takes two to tango even if you did a large part of the tango.

You have to be able to understand and see the situation emotionally both from within and from the outside as if you were a 3rd party/observer.

That may take many years, even with hard work, yes but it's worth trying.


Good luck.