The idea of therapy is tough today. I really miss my old T, the one Pdoc tried contacting that I had the transference with. I’m scared to even try to watch TV because I know if I binge watch Hulu all day it will distract me until I turn off the TV and then I’ll just get hit with a strong wave of emotions that may set off other things.

But why isn’t it getting easier? It’s been 4 months since I last saw her. I know my Pdoc probably made things worse because things were going fine until he brought her up in my session with him last week. but seriously why can’t I get over this.