Last year a couple weeks after thanksgiving I was forced into an IOP program by my therapist because I was messing with my meds and also displaying ED behaviors. It was a long 4 weeks and I had no support from my therapist. She wouldn’t work with me until I completed the program. I had a case manager who was ok. I just felt so alone and since it was at Christmas time it was even worse and I felt just lost without any 1 on 1 support.

I still think about this nonstop 6 months later. I just think of how alone I felt and it freaks me out and depresses me. I know it’s not even July but I am thinking nonstop about how to make this coming Christmas better. I mentioned this to my last therapist and I asked if she worked during Christmas time because of how freaked out last year made me feel. It will be one of the first things I talk about with my next therapist.

I just feel like I was messed up and a bit traumatized by the whole incident. I know it was my fault and I did learn stuff from the IOP. So I do feel like I benefited from it. But I just can’t seem to get over this.

Does anyone have any suggestions?