I ask them how they are doing, and I care. If I don’t feel like I know them well enough, then I don’t feel like I should ask just to be polite. So I presume people generally feel the same towards me.

Sometimes I think I may have given TMI. Then I am embarrassed I told them how I really am doing instead of the polite response of “fine”. When I was going through a trauma a couple years ago, I made a new friend and went to lunch with her. I spilled the whole story then felt mortified I told too much. I never called her again to nurture the friendship because I was embarrassed. That was dumb self sabotage on my part. She may not have even thought badly of me.

Another old friend I reconnected with had a lunch with me. We had to give each other a brief history of our lives since we had known each other 20 years prior. I hadn’t even told her anything negative. She stopped me before I told her about my life and said she didn’t want to hear my stories of “gloom and doom” and she didn’t want to be friends! 😱. I didn’t take that personally. It was her issue as I had given her no reason to say that. She was just that closed and curt of a person. At least she was honest! I told her she should get a mat for her front door that says “unwelcome”.