I'm really struggling. I feel like some of my life is falling apart, like I've gotten the death card in tarot or something and its coming true and I'm not ready.

Some of it has to do with hurt. Having been hurt by others. Actually, all of it does.

I'm not ready to leave my meditation group. I'm not ready to stop volunteering. I'm just taking some time away from both places due to being hurt, and figuring out how I want to proceed.

And then there's my brother. He's causing me a lot of pain. I wrote about it in the relationships forum. My family. I just don't feel able to deal with this while depressed. It breaks my heart.

I truthfully may need a therapist who I click with better. But imo, therapy doesn't do much these days.

I wish I had more solid and deep friendships. I wish...I wish I felt like more of a member here. I'm a previous member. It just hasn't been the same for a while now.