Dear Old T,

Today I am not sure why I am seeing you... What I am expecting to get out of it. Session is tomorrow though.

I had drafted some writing, but today I realised I don't want to show you. I guess it would take many sessions to 'catch up', it that's what we were doing. Is that what we are doing though? I'm not sure what we are doing!!

I needed to see you to help me believe I wasn't going mad over this whole thing with my current T. You did help with that. Maybe I still need help with that. I still don't know whats going on with her. I am kind of assuming she will start working again... I have a little faith in that still, but who really knows.

I guess I could use to practice opening up about the abuse to. I mean I want you start doing that with other people, but I can't see a way to yet. Maybe this could be a way to start?

I realised this week that I have no idea how much of my past you know about. That frightens me a little. Maybe we start there? That's where my writings have started, but I get scared I think, and then my thoughts turn to hiding it all away again.

See you soon I guess, and maybe a path will become clear when we sit down!

Me