It feels like he is blaming me a lot. At times I am just unsure. Maybe I am expecting him to act this way and it is not this black and white? Maybe my issues are part of this, too?

I think, he was hurt, because we helped my grandparents to make an anouncement. Because they wanted to sign an anouncement about their daugther's death. And they included their son, my cousin and her boyfriend. And to my bf it is as though we "forgot" him. Or that I failed to stand up for him.

I just feel stupid. I was about to move in. Now that he is sleeping on the sofa, I just want to go home, or anywhere where one is allowed to morne and be off track only one week after your mother died...
I think, I will ask him, to tell me, when he feels ready to have me back... I dont want to be the reason he has to sleep on the couch.
I just feel this numbness again. As tough it did not really matter either way.

I see how he may have misunderstood about the other boyfriend. Maybe he was a long time, loved part of the family and important to the grandparents. Your bf is newer, you don’t live together, he’s not like a long time bf or husband.

You should do what you feel like doing and allow yourself to grieve. It feels to me like your mother, in asking that only you and your father be mentioned, knew your bf was not good…perhaps she helped you here.