My husband and I are separated living in the same house. I am three weeks away from delivering our daughter, our sons are 4 and 2. This pregnancy is a disaster, with gallbladder pain that keeps me up all night. Needless to say, I'm tired, and could use a little help around the house.

Yesterday, on my husbands day off, I told him to take some time to work on "his stuff". He is starting a business from home, and because I've been in and out of the hospital for the last four weeks, he hasn't had alot of time to work on it. He started his sales calls at 1:30 in the afternoon, the kids and I didn't really see him until bedtime at 10:30 pm (we go to bed late because of his job in the restaurant biz). I did the dishes in the morning. I ran out and grabbed groceries (although he did offer to go, but I needed to get out), I made lunch and cleaned up, I went to my OB appointment, I broke up all the kid fights, colored the pictures, took out the garbage, made a huge dinner (he forgot to say thank you - too busy on the computer), cleaned up, fed the dogs, played "Transformers" with the boys, and got them ready for bed. A few times throughout the day, he asked if there was "anything he could do for me", usually when I was already in the middle of doing something!

He thanked me at 10:00pm for "letting him do his stuff", I said I hadn't realized he was going to be at it all day. He looked at the clock and said "Oh ya, I guess I was, but it's important to us". I told him "No, it's important to you."

When this pregnancy went south, I asked him to step back from the business somewhat so that he could help me more around the house. He did for a while, but now that we've separated, it seems like he's using it as an escape. He has always believed having more money would solve most of our problems, and I told him last night again that I was going back to work after I am healed from the c-section to help us make ends meet. I am glad he's decided to put his business plan in motion, and proud of him, but our priority right now (and I thought we had agreed on this) should be to get me through the rest of this pregnancy.

I think even more than the lack of help yesterday, I am upset that he didn't answer his counsellor back (he's doing email therapy sessions), and stayed up watching a movie instead. Also, I bought him a book last week (after he said he appreciates any direcdtion I can give him) that directly addresses his issues (I was so excited when I read the first 10 pages, it's exactly what I've been trying to tell him for 6 years!), and he hasn't even started to read it! I think I'm angry because it seems like he's doing the same thing as always, talking a great game about all the changes he wants to make within himself, but his actions speak otherwise. I don't want to give up on him as a person, but I think I was right, he's just not strong enough to deal with his issues. nd it hurts too much for me to keep hoping.

I haven't cried for a few days, today I'm crying...