I am so sorry it has been rough managing the new addition to your family. Even though it might seem like it .. two year olds do not want to displease the adults in his world on purpose. Something is causing his difficult behavior.

I am not an advocate for spanking, especially on the bare bottom. I feel that there are better methods for creating lasting change for a young child rather than physical punishment - especially for a two year old.

A book that helped us out a great deal when my son was younger and out of control was "the explosive child". That book was a big influence for us and really helped to explain how a learning disabled child can also have serious behavior issues. The biggest lesson learned for me is that no young child (not counting teens here) WANTS to be bad. Children want to please, especially their parents/teachers.

A major premise of the book is that children do not choose to be explosive and noncompliant any more than a child would choose to have a reading disability - bu are delayed in the process of developing the skills that are critical to being flexible and tolerating frustration. Or have significant difficulty applying these skills when they most need to.

Please consider exploring other parenting options.