Im not sure what fuzzy means, but i see it as, and this greatly relates to me, that, under stress, ruby gives out whats in her bucket. I was raised with rejection, so that means everyone is first my enemy. Making friends does not come naturally. I have a people-pleasing shell, but it doesnt go very far before it cracks.

People DO make friends at work, just not ever with me. Im too weird. And i was raised not to trust people. The first people i didnt trust were my parents (at a very young age). They confided in me that they hated each other (when i was older).

I was in therapy for 40 years, and my life fell apart when i got fired from my last job and was simultaneously being betrayed by my immediate family. It was too much. I didnt have enough help to make it through.

I hope ruby can find a way to make a new life for themself, being as perceptive and quickwitted as they are.

Eta - oh, i get it! Fuzzy answered the title question! Duh! Then i agree. My family made / makes it harder for me. They dont want to just help solve the problem, they want to change ME. Thats not the right answer.

But a lot of people here have reached out with helpful suggestions.