Quote:
Originally Posted by ArtleyWilkins
They couldn’t sympathize with you because your belief that your GM was somehow abandoning you and traumatizing you was delusional and other people simply cannot understand another person’s delusions. That’s one of the things that is just characteristic of delusional thinking. People find it really weird, probably a bit scary because they don’t understand it, and naturally distance themselves from someone who is delusional for their own personal sense of safety.
You perceived their response as rude. Maybe they were even actually rude, but that was due to your odd behavior over a delusion. On the other hand, your rude response was a real behavior directed deliberately toward them in retaliation for their response. Your delusional thinking and rude behavior has consequences. Coworkers don’t have to put up with that kind of treatment and they won’t. They don’t feel any personal stake in a work relationship.
Your off putting behavior was originally your delusional thinking and expectation that coworkers would understand it and sympathize with it; it wasn’t rudeness that turned them against originally. It was simply really odd behavior that they found probably weird and a bit creepy.
You seem to believe only rude or mean behavior should bother people. Often it takes much less or different from that for people to get that vibe that they need to avoid a person.
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You succinctly described what most people will usually do. It doesn't mean that that is the highest level of standard we have to aspire to, though. This forum is full of people who are interested in psychology and personal growth. Would it not be natural for us to hold ourselves to a higher standard then? Such as, if someone's mentally ill, we are able to recognise that and then we do not need to treat them with additional hostility. Yes, some people may have a mental illness that makes them have an outright delusional idea, makes them behave weirdly and so on. But we do not have to kick them further and be hostile to them. Does the odd behaviour hurt you? Is it actual physical or other severe danger or do you just feel a bit scared over it is it's weird and new and you are not sure what to expect? If the answer is "no", why would we need to kick the mentally ill person further, why would we need to release our frustration, distress or upset coming from the above feelings, instead of simply disengaging and keep proper boundaries? Is it too much of a hard effort to do so, to control our emotions and keep such boundaries?
I do realise it is too much to ask that from average people who are not interested in psychology&personal growth. But I was going to put this out here on this forum sooner or later. I finally had the time to write this out. I hope at least one person will think about it because then it wasn't wasted effort.
I will say I don't understand thread OP's thinking either about the managers, and I do think "delusion" is not a bad word to describe the idea about her way of thinking about her relationships with these managers, even if I feel like that's still a bit "off", it's still one of the best descriptions I've seen about it - but I don't see the point in *explicitly* endorsing rude and especially *repeatedly* rude or otherwise hostile behaviours of people in response. Even if they are people who don't have time for psychology and personal growth because life's demands and stresses keep them busy. And I realise we on here are also kept busy by them too but we are at least on this forum.....no?
So at least let's not endorse that. I do understand it if thread OP feels upset and feels like being rude in turn.
The ideal thing would of course be, someone having intervened in a professional way already, a long time ago, so OP wouldn't have to face these behaviours from most people.
But since that's not happened, as we don't live in an ideal society lol, and OP of course still makes her own priorities and decides if she's still okay with dealing with all that instead of finding an intensive treatment setting, group home or whatever options are available (I'm not familiar with the US system). Seems to me like OP is willing to take all that as her higher priority seems to be something else, e.g. idea of autonomy, being able to keep working, something else? And willing to recognise the cost for that is going to be this?