Hi again delevi: So... I read through your post. And you have quite a few questions at least some of which have are no simple "yes or no" answers. I think I could write a very long reply to all of this which, quite honestly, I don't really want to do. (Plus I don't know how effectively I could do it.) But I do have a couple of suggestions for you.

My first suggestion would be to spend some time reading posts on a transgender website. Many of the questions you have, have been asked by many others in the past who have gender identity concerns. And I think you would find answers to many of your questions on a transgender forum website. There are several you could choose from. But I think the one I would recommend in particular is: "Transpulse" Here's a link to their forums:

Transpulse & TransGender Pulse Forums

If you look down the list of the forums on Transpulse you'll see one titled: "What Am I? I'm Not Sure." That one, in particular, would be useful for you to peruse at length I would think.

And then my second suggestion would be, if you want to, private message me so we can communicate regarding all of this. I'll just mention though (just so you know) I'm an old man albeit one who has waged a life-long struggle with my own gender identity. (I never transitioned.) So, while I don't have experience with the webcam aspects of your situation, I'm pretty familiar with a lot of the other things you've experienced as well as the concerns you have.

So I think I'll leave it at that for now. I guess the other couple of things I would just say here are that you're not alone in what you're experiencing. (Perhaps you already know that. In my case I didn't know it literally for decades. I thought I was the only person in the history of the world who had ever been saddled with such desires.) And the other thing that is always strongly recommended is that a person find a mental health therapist to work with, preferably one who is knowledgeable regarding gender identity issues; a therapist who is not can do more harm than good (in my experience.) Best wishes...