OK here you can practice again about making different interpretations that are closer to neutral emotionally. As this was a simple, fleeting situation

BTW I don't really follow the nitpicking on here about this, I personally would've figured out from the entire context of the situation that you meant that the card was declined. Because all other options can be eliminated based on context. Like you didn't add that he needs to wipe the card again or anything like that, is part of the context. And so on. But this is a simple case, it's a pretty objective topic & context.... though of course sometimes misunderstandings can still happen, and that's no one's fault

So that's actually also why I wouldn't assume right away that he was playing. He sounded a bit annoyed, you did too, nothing big there, nothing to see, move on

And again this situation isn't important but I wanted to make a point in general.

Rechu mentioned seeking resources and that reminded me, are you accepting that there's stuff going on in you that needs dealing with, and then if so, are you seeking out resources for yourself until you can go to therapy? There's tons of articles, books, forums, where you can read up on things and educate yourself to get somewhere with your processing of what's happened repeatedly to you and how to deal with it in a way more beneficial to yourself.

IMO: Let go of trying to make explanations about people without doing the education first. Self-reflection and processing your own emotions first will help with dealing with the rest about people too. It is inefficient to come here and ask us about all of it, instead of first educating yourself on your own about it.

And that would be the minimum you can do if you want to keep working. It would be the responsible thing to do. Even when you do get back to therapy, you have to do 90% of the work yourself as homework, the 1 hour / week meeting with the therapist is a small part of it.

IMO think about whether you are willing to commit to this because it is going to be big work for several years.

And I say all this because you said work is a big part of your identity. Well, part of doing the work is being able to not be needing your coworkers and managers to be extra nice to you, and just simply have the professional relationships with a little friendliness but not more. This is what everyone's has been telling you on here and it's for a reason. You can be professional only that way. If work is your identity, you have to take responsibility and learn this too.

Otherwise the cost you pay for continuing to work will just be too great in the end. You've already paid a lot, by having lost (even if hopefully temporarily) trust in a lot of people. That's a big cost just to keep working. Are you willing to really pay that cost? When you don't even have to.

This is all my opinion of course. You know I don't try to assume you have to be at fault for everything. And this isn't about that either, it's not about blaming you for stuff. This is about taking responsibility and ownership to become more professional at work. But others explained that a lot better several times already in this thread.