Quote:
Originally Posted by divine1966
Who knows what’s normal. I think whatever works for people that’s their normal. Yeah I love my mom but I’d not want to eat dinner with her every day. She’d not be up to it either. I have a friend in her mid 40s who lives just few houses from her parents. She eats dinner with them every night. It’s either she goes there to eat or they show up at her house. I think we are reasonably close family but I’d skip town if I had to eat dinner with them every day. It’s insane in my books, but it’s normal for my friend and her family.
I’d say eating dinner with mom every time I visit a boyfriend wouldn’t work for me either. Especially listening to her. Occasionally maybe. But other than that no thanks. I’d want to stay in my own house and eat my own dinner without having to listen to no one’s mom. I think it’s understandable it was a strain. It would be for me. I don’t have the patience for it.
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If we didn’t want to eat dinner with her he’d have to tell her we were eating downstairs. The fact that he has to tell her is indicative of what I’m talking about. Anyways that’s behind me now. The bigger strain was his drinking/smoking/using and her enablement of that behavior.
Like when she tried to ban smoking he threw a tantrum and got his way . That was another red flag. There were so many instances that indicated he was not a good partner for me. She labeled us as partners and I was like “he’s not my partner , he lives with his mother, he’s my boyfriend”.
It’s going to take me a while to heal.