Quote:
Originally Posted by Rose76
This mother has got this son exactly where she wants him, and she's not letting go. That nonsense about her being hurt because of you not greeting her upon arrival was a case of her marking her territory. She was letting you know that she runs the show (of his life.) Momma and Sonny are a package deal. To get to him you literally have to go through her. That would never change. Those two are in a very stable relationship. She may actually want a potential daughter-in-law, but only on her terms. That means she gets to control two people, instead of just one. I think you dodged a bullet.
Incidentally, his weird relationship with Momma is what's driving his substance abuse issues. That's his llittle way of rebelling and depriving her of total control.
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Yep I knew he was in another relationship I just didn’t know it was with his mother; I didn’t know that was a possibility.
Yeah another thing I didn’t like about her is I would listen to how she talked about how she didn’t like certain female children and animals disposition, describing them as sullen. That made me feel unsafe as someone who struggles. One time I made the mistake of mentioning to her I felt down and she has me if I had cycles? She of course is perfect, has no mental health or substance abuse issues, she’s a teetotaler . When I told her I couldn’t be around her son drinking and using she made it seem like I was the one with the problem!
I’m just glad to have created space between them both and myself.
I would tell him over and over again he was supposed to stand up for me not her, and he just didn’t get it. Like if I’m the one having the problem then I’m the one with the problem because there’s nothing wrong with his thinking or actions.
He even foolishly thought it was a matter of spending time with my narcissistic parents, that that would fix things.