Quote:
Originally Posted by ruby2011
I only become like that when someone walks out on me, and that happens once every few years. The McDonald’s GM stopped giving a crap about me so I get angry a lot. Arby’s GM rejected me like hell 3 years ago, so I got angry like that for months until I got my current job at McDonald’s.
It’s hard to process my grief and depression when I lost ALL ability to trust anyone. Mainly, how do I know that the next good person won’t also walk out on me?
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How about you go and journal alone about your vents that are like this?
We won't be able to lift you up about it so you might as well write about it on your own.
Bonus: if the walking out on you happens only once a few years, that's not frequent at all. So it doesn't matter much.
You overfocus on the negatives, if one person doesn't like you you are already extremely upset even if 99 other people have no problem with you.
So no wonder you have conclusions like no one cares about you even if you had a working relationship with the person for several years before it and even if you only have people leave you only every few years.
Or the conclusion how all people have such a big problem with your behaviour in general, you oscillate between this extreme conclusion and the more factual conclusion that people usually see that you have some weird behaviours but can tolerate it for the most part for several years. And then some don't love it but tolerate it or are neutral about it, and some - the minority - complain, and some are friends with you.
Minus your overly strong enmeshment with the managers, it seems to be like a livable situation to me. Your oscillation between extreme negative and normal factual viewpoints does not help your case, and it makes others act the same way towards you if you talk about yourself using this perspective too much (self-fullfilling prophecy), and it's exactly what CBT and DBT are targeted to fix.
See more on that below.
Quote:
Originally Posted by ruby2011
I want to transfer so I behave myself. It’s just unsustainable long term if I’m not even welcome at the store I work at. Once I transfer, I’ll find it easier to behave because people there don’t yet know me so they won’t start off rude to me. It’s a badly needed fresh start
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Look up Rational Emotive Behaviour Therapy. An early (pioneering) form of CBT but it's good. There are books on it online, you don't even need a therapist to practice it.
That would be great practice in learning to reword your emotionally extreme sentences.
Such as:
"It's a badly needed fresh start"
What?
No, rephrase it as:
"It would be nice to do to this but I can look for another option too"
And imagine that emotionally. Shape your emotions in imagination to the rationally worded latter sentence that's balanced and not extreme.
DO this for ALL your emotionally extreme sentences. Practice it.
Even for the title of this very same thread.
"Are people in your life extremely unsupportive during your hard times?"
Rephrase into:
"Some people in my life are uncaring and unsupportive during my hard times, and some other people do try to help me, for example I have this long thread already on people trying to help me in VARIOUS ways, and they have been trying for years, I have even some people around who are not always nice to me who sometimes do try and give help anyway, both here and IRL too."