What you found out was that you can't handle a relationship with this particular alcoholic. Not unless you want to feel slighted every second day. It's probably also true that, for the sake of your sobriety, you do well to not date any man who is drinking. Without the sobriety, nothing else is going to be too good in your life.

Even if this guy stopped drinking, there'ld still be the mother issue. You can't change another person. That's one thing I got out of Al-Anon. It's not even my place to want to re-fashion another human being. He lives as he believes works for him. He does seem to have worked out an approach to life that allows him a certain stability. He holds on to a job and gets along with at least some co-workers. He could be a lot more screwed up than he is. But he's simply not available for what you're looking for.

It must be hard to see him almost daily at work and still be attracted to him. When you're not at work, make the most of your other connections, especially with others who are sincerely working a program. There is strength in fellowship.