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I have tried to communicate my problem with her but she acts disproportionately hurt and dejected, as though I have crushed her feelings.
My sister is mostly good to me, except when I point out anything negative about her or ask her to do/stop doing something. Then she can be scathingly abusive.
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I would describe the above as
emotional blackmail, which is when someone punishes you emotionally when you don't do or say what they want.
Emotional blackmail - Wikipedia
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The problem is, the nicer she is acting towards me the more trapped I am feeling. Whenever she meets me she expects to be kissed and hugged and treated like a baby. She speaks in a baby voice and cocks her head in a childish way and pouts and sings 'cute' little songs and they simply drive me crazy. She wants us to eat together, read books together, watch shows together. She wants me to dote on her 24 hours a day. So much so that I breathe a sigh of relief when she finally leaves
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I would not describe her as being nice to you when she persists in doing things that drive you crazy and then gets unpleasant when you share how you feel about what she is doing. Nor would I consider those behaviors to be age-appropriate ways to demonstrate love for you.
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I know I shouldn't feel this way about a person who is my family and who loves me so much.
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Why shouldn't you feel that way? A serious question.
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But she truly suffocates me. She is coming tomorrow and already my anxiety has spiked. I tried to dissuade her but she said she misses me. What can I say to that?
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It sounds like you feel helpless to do anything about her visits or behavior.
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I want her in my life and I don't want to hurt her but I can't go on like this. Or am I the monster for thinking this way?
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You are not a monster. Just to give you some perspective, if I myself had a sibling who was doing what your sister is doing I would feel very much like you are describing. Suffocated. Overwhelmed. Anxious about, dreading their next visit.
My thinking is that you have two basic choices. You can allow things to continue as they are, in the name of family and her feelings about you. Or you can have an honest conversation with her in which you establish some boundaries.
In my opinion the second choice is healthier for you--and also for her. However, you will be running the risk that she gets upset, gets abusive, speaks poorly about you to family, and separates herself from you, at least temporarily.
If you decide to establish some boundaries, what might they be?
No.