I’m doing decently today. I had just planned on staying home but my mom says our beach trip might be rained out. But we have non refundable hotel rooms. So she looked to see if there were any local non chain bookstores around. We found one and I got a couple books. One of them was $30. I guess I should look at prices when I buy things. My mom gave me a kind of tough time about it. Then I got hangry but it wasn’t really visible I just said I was really hungry. so we found a little local restaurant with decent food and good prices. I got a ribeye sandwich and I asked for it with only cheese. When the waiter brought our food to us mine had onions on it. I didn’t make a big deal like some would. I just scrapped off the onions and still gave him a 20% tip. I’m really easy going in real life.

But my bleeding was so bad last night and really painful. It says online (I mean there was a lot of blood that’s why I googled it. I was really freaking out) that when this stuff happens to trans men a hysterectomy is a necessity. I’m just worried I have something going on now that needs immediate attention. But I don’t have a doctor yet. And I don’t have a fever. So I’ve just been ignoring it.

It does feel like I have a UTI though. I feel a bit washed up and tired. But I’ve also cut way back on my Valium so maybe I’m just feeling the affects of that.

I didn’t realize until my mom just told me that we leave for our trip on Tuesday. That shows how excited I am about this vacation. I like this town in general and I’ve gone every summer since 2016 (except last year) but I am nervous about seeing family I haven’t seen in awhile and also my old transference therapist vacations in this town. I think she usually goes the week before Labor Day. But I have no idea because I usually go Labor Day weekend and I’m going at a different time this year. It would be incredibly awkward to run into her but if we do run into each other and she ignores me it could bum me out as well.