Maybe you've watched an episode of "The Dog Whisperer - Ceasar Milan." He often goes into a home where there is a dog who just loves and loves and loves one person. He always sits on that person's lap, doesn't want anyone else to touch that person, has a fit if that person leaves the house. The person typically says, "This dog just loves me so much." Ceasar will say that dog isn't expressing love. That dog is claiming you as his property. The dog wants to own you. That is disrespectful.

You need "boundaries." You need to learn the power of "No." Right now, when you try to say No, you feel you have to give her a big rationalization. Start turning down some of her invitations . . . without pleading for her permission to have your own life. She's claiming your person, your attention and your time. That's her being grabby. A lot of what she does is not coming from a place of love. A lot is coming from a place of greed and refusal to respect that your time and space belongs to you. She is "intrusive." She gets away with it.

You have to stop idealizing her and treat her like the spoiled pooch who insists on jumping all over his person. Back her down.