Little bit of both. No, seriously it is real. I had a very bad breakdown on the morning on the first day, before I left. I was on the phone with T, in absolute wild hysterics, telling him that there was no way I could it; I was not emotionally ready. A few minutes later I pulled myself together and said this is not my whole career-- this is one day. And I went. It has been difficult, I will not lie about that. I am not in most most stable state right now. On my first day, I was assigned a caseload of 115 patients. There is about a 60 to 70 percent show rate. There is tons of paperwork. Treatment plans, progress notes, etc. I start seeing patietns on Monday. Oooooooooooops gotta go, gotta pick up in laws at train station. Graduation tomorrow. MOre later.