Thanks for the support. It helps to be able to put feelings into words and to know that I'm not the only one who has felt this way. I'll talk to my t about it.
I've been on medical leave due to anxiety etc. Sometimes it seems like it would be easier (safer) to hide out and not deal with the world but a healthy part of me knows I need to keep trying. It's exhausting though! I don't feel like I have anything left to give right now in return for everyone's support.