@Lizzie1813 and others:

I have a perspective from the other side of things. I am emotionally estranged from my mother in the sense that I have no desire to share my life with her but I will speak with her on a surface level. My brother is almost 100% estranged from her. Part of the reason is because after our dad died she collapsed into her own depression. She never even tried to get help, she just let it overtake her and neglected us emotionally. She very rarely said I love you or even did basic things like make or at least provide meals, clean, etc.

My brother is desperate to have a relationship with her and she rebuffs him at every turn. This fuels my anger. I have forgiven the past. What’s done is done. But it’s her behavior NOW that I have an issue with.

My point is if you are getting the help you need and trying to improve yourself, your son may still come around. If my mother ever acknowledged that she needed help back then or even better attempted to seek help now, I would be more willing to interact with her. So hopefully your son will see how committed you are to recovery and take that to heart eventually.