I drink out of a bottle. It’s an adult size one but it has monsters on it. I do use a pacifier. I have 3 actually. They are adult size ones that I found on Amazon. Sometimes I wear diapers when I’m super stressed and I just need to relax and rewind. I have a black adult size onesie I wear over them. I only use these things at night although if I’m home alone I may drink out of the bottle during the day.
Sometimes at night when I am super stressed I just need to get into my space with these things and rewind.
One of my therapists knew and she was completely accepting. My mom doesn’t know anything at least she’s not saying anything if she does know. I keep everything hidden in the bottom 2 drawers of my dresser that is in my walk in closet. I have hardwood floors so she doesn’t need to vacuum so she doesn’t really need to be in there at all. I did mention having some private things that I am discussing in therapy and I’d like her to respect my privacy. And she said “yeah sure.” So there hasn’t been an issue. I have almost gotten caught a number of times though.