If you're referring to psych help, I'm not getting any specific help. My PCP who is a PA orders my antidepressant. I just take that one psych med. Last year, adter my bf died, I followed up on a referral to get psych med management and maybe some therapy. But it was all done via "Zoom," and it just seemed so mechanical. I'ld have an interview with a psych nurse practitioner. I see her on the screen of my phone. She be typing away at her desktop. She read off questions from her computer monitor and typed every answer I gave. It was like talking to a robot.

The hospital case manager
offered to set up visits from a home attendant to help me while I am this weak. I literally am challenged to vacuum the place. But I thought that was a bit over-kill. I'm neither quite that old, or that incapacitated. I guess they were concerned because I have no family anywhere near me. (They're far, far away.)

I'll try to do a bit every few hours. I coukd hire some help, if I want something strenuous done. We had home attendants when my bf was sick. They arrive with zero skills.

I'll manage. I have a nextdoor neighbor who's a genius at organization. We just had a nice, long visit. I'll get some tips and inspiration from her.

A year ago I was caregiving around the clock with my bf. He couldn't walk. I would shower him, toilet him, lift him in and out of the car, cook, clean and trim his rose bushes. To go from being that able-bodied to hardly able to walk across a parking lot is just unbelieveable to me. And the doctors don't know where in my gut the blood is draining from. They believe I have a slow, continuous bleed somewhere.

So I'm anxious about where this situation is going. I was often anemic as a child and as a real young adult. I would take iron pills and be fine. But severe anemia that recurs is a whole different animal. It's incapacitating. So I am anxious about where this is all going.