My endocrinologist called me. He doesn’t have an appointment until the middle of September. Which isn’t a big deal. My new primary said he can prescribe them if I run out before I can get into to see the doctor.

I’m not gonna lie I’m a bit nervous about having another surgery. I haven’t gotten a call back as to when it will be set up but I’m hoping it will be today. Last night I had pain again. And it’s tough to tell my mom about it because then I’d have to tell her how it’s happening and that’s why I wanted to go into my gynecologist alone. Basically as my primary called it it happens after I “stimulate” myself and that’s how the bleeding happens too. The bleeding and pain is how I’m getting my insurance to cover it. So I guess it’s kind of good? That I had pain last night. But my therapist was kinda asking me about it and telling me how you have to use the bathroom after and just to keep up with my hygiene. I mean, I’m 28 years old I don’t think I need to be told this kind of stuff. Sometimes I feel like I get treated like I’m young and clueless because of my autism. People are super nice to me all the time but when they hear I’m autistic they kinda talk down to me in this overly friendly tone like I’m a kid. Looking like I’m 18 and having my mom with me doesn’t help either I guess. But it looks like going back to work isn’t going to happen for the foreseeable future. I had planned on going back in August. But then the surgery is happening and I can’t start a job and then immediately leave for 6 weeks. The type of job I do is all physical. So it’s going to have to be after the surgery which hasn’t been scheduled yet as I said. I want to work and I should be working but it’s ok for me not to be at this moment.

I went to Dicks Sporting Goods this morning to look at their shirts. I wear a boys XL in shirts because men’s are too big. Unless it’s like from Hollister which sells guys clothes instead of mens. It’s kinda awkward to shop that department in person. Especially when I don’t know the store well and I have to ask. But I got 3 North Face shirts. All said XL. I looked at the men’s section and the colors were so much better. But I held up a small and it was huge and very long. So I got home and I tried on two of the shirts. They were huge on me and fit really weirdly. I then realized they were women's XL. Which is super embarrassing. The actual boys XL fit. I thought the cashier was being a bit weird when I was asking him questions about the shirts.