I feel a lot better after my episode last night. The 2 anti vertigo meds didn’t really even make me tired. And the 3 melatonin I took still took their usual time to work. So I was kind of panicking for a couple hours and I was unable to really do anything about it. But today after reading the replies from my threads on here and talking to my mom more about things I feel better. Although I’m still super anxious about things and I have SpongeBob on for a distraction which always helps.

I ate half a bag of Frank’s Red Hot Goldfish today. My calorie budget allowed for it but my stomach is on fire right now plus the period cramps I have as well aren’t helping. I never eat spicy foods but I’m obsessed with Goldfish and this was my first time trying these. They are actually very mild taste wise. I took Tylenol and I’m sitting with a heating pad turned on high. Both are helping.

This morning I created an online order that I can place on Wednesday for a store out of state. My mom is going to a reunion and I’ve been begging to go shopping there. They have a few international grocery stores I like and a huge grocery store with everything you can think of including the candy I get at the international stores. But she keeps talking about hotels and how it’s not possible and stuff. So we agreed that she’d do a curbside pickup for me on her way home. I have almost $100 worth of groceries on my list but it’s stuff I can’t find here and it’s still less money and less of a headache for her then dealing with the drive and hotels.

So today I’m just trying to keep my mind calm. I really don’t have any other option but to watch TV. It’s the only thing that can truly keep my mind occupied. I have therapy tomorrow morning. We’ll talk about what went on this week with the doctors appointments and she wants me to fill out a release of information so she can talk with the therapist she’s switching me to so they can discuss my case so I can have a smooth transfer. My current therapist seems more willing to help me deal with a good transfer then my transference T who just said “well I’ll call her and talk about things.” And she didn’t actually call she emailed her a few days after the first session. I was very confused about why transference T said she’d call on a specific day and time but didn’t. The email she sent was a bunch of BS too.

So I hope things do go easier with this transfer.