Wow, good on you for finding the strength and courage to look despite everything! It definitely sounds wise to seek out support even if it only turns out to be temporary. It won't be or feel the same but I hope it gives you something of what you need as you try to deal with what happened with your previous T. I'm glad she wrote back to you and didn't say a definite 'no' to contact at some stage in the future, but it's such an abrupt ending nonetheless and you're probably having so many different thoughts and feelings about her and what happened. I hope you find someone supportive and compassionate to process it all with, whether a therapist or someone else. Good luck.