I took 4th Valium around the same time. Elton John took 40 one time and he was ok. I mean he ended up in rehab but he didn’t die. The Valium isn’t doing much and I ate an unwich from Jimmy Johns because I thought I needed something to eat other then spicy Goldfish and dry Cheerios. That didn’t help either. Maybe I’ll try my 20mil geodon. I signed that paperwork and I’ll drop it off at the office before therapy tomorrow.

I know I needed a session sooner which is why I saw her last week. but I hope I can get used to going every other week with therapy because thinking about it nonstop the entire week is starting to get tiresome and I think is adding to my anxiety.

Edit: I’m out of my 20mil Geodon. I guess the doctor hasn’t called it in yet. My Pdoc and pharmacists can go shove it. I guess I’ll just take my lamictal and propalanol in 15 minutes. I usually take those an hour later but I’m kind of desperate right now for some relief from my feelings.

Then I’ll take my melatonin around 3:30-4 and my Geodon around 6. And just hope I can make it through the night without any issues.

Edit again: I took my melatonin and my Geodon. I’m in bed and I’m still pretty anxious. I have my weighted stuff I’m just not sure how else to handle my anxiety besides taking a 5th Valium. I’m not sure how I’ll be able to go to 2 a day in September. Hopefully my anxiety will be less then it is now.

I just took a 5th Valium. Then I immediately gave the bottle to my mom and told her to take control of them and only give me 3 a day. This has been very out of control lately.