I was blessed to be raised with no one telling me anything about sexuality. I got to discover for myself, my own libido, turn ons, etc… No shame was placed upon me by anyone! . IMHO, it is the ultimate self care. It feels good and it hurts no one.

“ my anxiety gets instantly better the second I’m done even if it was out of control all day”
^I feel this way, too. After the release of orgasm, it feels good; like the rush of endorphins after a work out.

I’m sorry it made you feel disgusted. Where did you get that ‘stinking thinking’? That’s something to discuss with your t.