I’m kinda panicking about a lot of stuff. I took my 160 mil of Geodon super early. So now I’m probably messed up for tomorrow as well since I can’t take any more tonight. But hopefully I get super trippy and out of it so I don’t have to feel my anxiety or anything else for the rest of the day. It’s unusual for me to get this panicky and anxious this time of day. Usually I don’t do anything unhealthy until later in the evening.

I’m not tired from the meds. Not spiraling anymore but not 100% ok either. I have my beats on so I can’t hear if the phone rings at all. My mom gets the calls on her phone.

I’m listening to the song Unwell by Matchbox Twenty.

I have a couple more hours for my call to come in. And then if it doesn’t I’ll have to do this all over again tomorrow. But my Geodon got called in finally.

I don’t know. I just feel unusually weird today but I’ve been up for a long time and my meds were so messed up today. Maybe I’ll try a hot bath with some vicks vapor bath salts.

I took the bath. Then I ate a burrito and took 4 zzquil pure zzz gummies. Not sure if 4 was too much or not. But I just want this day to be over with so I can start the same **** all over again in the morning.